Drunken Guilt
by rika08
Summary: Post: RSRD. Lindsya's sitting in a bar after work but she can't get Danny out of her head. Even her taunting drink on the counter isn't enough to clear her mind of him. better than it sounds. D/L


Country music blared over the speakers throughout a small bar. The bar was packed in every seat and stool. People crowded around pool tables, playing for money. The air was thick with smoke from ignorant lighters.

Seated at he bar, in the far corner, was Detective Lindsay Monroe. She sat hunched over the bar, staring at her untouched glass in front of her. She'd entered the bar only two hours ago, once her shift at the lab had ended, and hadn't moved since. She closed her eyes and sighed, following the blaring music.

_It's time to take my drunk ass home_

_I drank all the whiskey_

_And my money's all gone_

_Hit on all the girls_

_Sang every song_

_It's time to take my drunk ass home _

Lindsay smiled and tapped her foot with the beat. Though she wasn't drunk like this singer, but it made her smile. She usually found that drunk people do some random things. Her finger ran down the side of her untouched glass. The drink was so tempting to her; all she wanted to do was down it in one gulp.

She couldn't seem to get her mind off Danny. It had been only four hours ago that his brother had been admitted to the hospital and was fighting to live. And then there was Danny coming up as a suspect in an unsolved missing person's case. Of course Danny was now clear, but it'd cost him his brother. Lindsay sighed and shook her head. She could only imagine how Danny felt now.

The bartender stopped in front of Lindsay. "Can I get ya anything? Ya haven't touched your drink since you got it."

Lindsay gave a faint smile. "No, I'm sorry."

"Long day?" the bartender asked.

"You have no idea." Lindsay answered.

The bartender leaned on the counter. "Well lets see. From what you ordered, your days are stress filled and in dire need of disappearing. Stockholder? Teacher? Doctor?"

"Detective." Lindsay answered.

"Ah, yeah that'll do it. Especially in this city." the bartender said.

Lindsay sighed. She straightened up and pulled out a bill for her drink. "I'm sorry for wasting your time and drinks."

The bartender shook his head. "No trouble at all Miss. Have a good night."

Lindsay nodded and stood from her seat. She weaved her through the crowd of people through the bar. Getting drunk wasn't a choice for her. If she got drunk every time she got a hard case, Lindsay might herself becoming an alcoholic.

Something snagged Lindsay's arm, causing her to turn around. A large man, near six four, had grabbed her arm. Lindsay could clearly smell the liquor on his breath. He staggered as he stood from his chair, slipping his drink on her pants.

"Hey…I've been…watching you." he slurred.

Lindsay restrained herself from frowning. She grabbed a napkin and started dabbing the alcohol from her pants.

"How 'bout you come home with me tonight? I can make it worth while for ya." he said.

"No thanks." Lindsay said. She pulled her arm from the man's grip and turned around.

"Now see here, lady. I get what I want! No one says 'no' to me!" the man yelled.

Lindsay ignored him. She pushed open the doors of the bar and exited the building. The air had grown cool, calming to Lindsay's mind. Lindsay started her walk to the subway. She just wanted to get home. Maybe she'd call Danny and see how he was doing when she got home. Actually, maybe she'd do it now. Lindsay opened her purse and started searching for her cell phone.

Suddenly Lindsay was yanked back and thrown into the wall. Lindsay's purse was ripped off her shoulder in a painful second. Lindsay looked up to find the bar man standing in front of her. His face was twisted in anger. He leaned in toward Lindsay. He leaned on his hands, which were on either side of Lindsay.

"Where do you think you're goin'?" the man demanded.

"Away from you." Lindsay spat.

"That wasn't very nice." he said.

"Tough luck." Lindsay said. She ducked under his left arm.

The man quickly grabbed Lindsay and threw her back against the wall. "I didn't say you could go missy."

"I don't give a damn what you think, now let me go!" Lindsay ordered.

The man leaned closer to Lindsay. "No one says 'no' to me."

"Well I did!" Lindsay replied.

Lindsay felt his body press against hers. "And I get what I want. I ALWAYS get what I want."

"Let me go!" Lindsay ordered. She struggled to get free from the drunken mans grasps, but even wasted, the guy was strong.

The man leaned in toward Lindsay's face. "Stop struggling missy."

"Go to hell." Lindsay spat. She kicked her knee up into the man's stomach.

He doubled over in pain, allowing Lindsay to free her arms from his vice grip. She pushed him off her, letting him collapse onto the sidewalk. Lindsay sighed in relief and walked around the man's body. She pushed her hair out of her face and took a few extra steps from the guy. He wouldn't be down for long, just long enough to give her time to move.

"Hey!" someone yelled.

Lindsay looked up. Several men, who'd she seen with the drunk earlier in the bar, were making their way toward her. "Oh damn it." Lindsay turned and started running down the street. A quick glance over her shoulder told Lindsay they were following her. She pushed herself, but her boots weren't made for running, especially on the concrete.

Lindsay rounded the corner, hoping to use it to gather some distance between herself and the drunks. She barely made ten feet before someone pulled her arm. Lindsay stumbled into the person who grabbed her, hiding her in the alley. Someone covered her mouth and held her still. Lindsay had no time to make a motion. The drunks rounded the corner. Lindsay froze against the person and prayed that he wouldn't turn her in to the drunks out there.

"Where the hell did she go?" one asked.

"She couldn't have gone far." another said.

"Whatever, let's go get Jerry and get outta here." said another man.

Lindsay listened to the softening of their footsteps. She relaxed as their footsteps grew to nothing in the air. The hand holding her mouth and body withdrew from her. She could hear a sigh from behind her.

"You sure know how to attract attention Montana."

Lindsay spun around quickly. "Danny!"

Danny looked down at her. Lindsay could see the red in his eyes and the recent streaks of tears that had rolled down his face. "You alright?"

"Yeah. Thanks for the save." Lindsay said.

Danny smirked. "You always cause that much trouble?"

Lindsay opened her mouth to protest Danny's accusations, but Danny held up his hand chuckling. "I'm kiddin', I saw what happened."

"You saw?" Lindsay asked. She couldn't recall ever seeing Danny on the sidewalk.

Danny nodded. "I was across the street when that drunk asshole grabbed you. I couldn't get across in time to stop him, not like you needed help." Lindsay blushed. "But I did manage to get ahead of you before you were chased in my direction."

Lindsay nodded. She hadn't seen him because he hadn't been directly near her at the time. "What are doing here anyways?"

"Visiting hours at the hospital ended and I didn't feel like headin' home just yet." Danny explained. "I thought I'd get drunk, but I changed my mind against it. What about you?"

Lindsay blushed. "Trying to get drunk, but I couldn't even take a sip from my drink."

Danny smirked. "Two NY detectives can' seem to get drunk. What a story."

Lindsay watched as the laughter on Danny's face quickly died. "Danny, how're you holding up?"

Danny shook his head. "I dunno, Lindsay. It's all come at me in a rush and….and I'm…I'm not even sure my brain's processed everything."

Lindsay took Danny's arm and gave a gentle tug. "Come on."

Danny pushed himself off the wall and followed Lindsay out onto the sidewalk. They walked slowly along the sidewalk, Lindsay's hand still holding his arm. Neither said a word for neither knew what to say. Lindsay tried to think of something that could help Danny. Something that could ease the pain, but nothing came to her. All she felt that she could do was be there fro him. Like she was now.

"You got any sibling's Montana?" Danny asked out of the blue.

Lindsay looked up at Danny and nodded. "Two."

"Older or younger?"

"Both." Lindsay answered.

"How far would you go for their safety?" Danny asked.

Lindsay thought for a short moment. "I'd trade my life for theirs. I wouldn't care why it happened or what they'd done, but I wouldn't let anything happen to them."

Danny was silent. He seemed to be thinking of Lindsay's answer. Lindsay turned her head. Perhaps she shouldn't have answered Danny's question. It seemed to have only made things worse.

Lindsay came to a dead stop in the middle of the sidewalk. Danny was pulled to a stop seconds later. Lindsay slowly let Danny's arm go. "Danny, I know today was hard for you, and I have no idea how you're feeling right now. But I want you to know, that none of this was your fault. None of it. We all reach a point in our lives to put our safety aside for our loves ones, regardless of the consequences. All that matters is the safety of the ones we love.

Louie made that call tonight when he talked to Sonny. I don't know everything he was thinking, but I do the reason he went in there was to save you from something you didn't deserve. He wanted to save you from Sonny's frame job and didn't care what it cost him. Just like he saved you form Jersey Stadium fifteen years ago." Lindsay finished.

Danny looked up from the ground. Tears formed behind his glasses, rolling down his cheek. "Ya know, back then, I was so mad at Louie for doin' that, things were never settled between us after that. An' then I find out on that damn tape, that he was just lookin' out for me. He kept up that lie for fifteen years an' never even hinted that it was all fake. Why would he do that? Why?"

"You were his priority Danny. Maybe he couldn't risk letting you find out. Louie might've thought you'd still be in danger." Lindsay explained.

"I spent the past fifteen years after that moment pissed off at him. An' now…I can't even tell my brother how a feel." Danny cried. He ripped off his glasses and dried to dry his eyes.

Lindsay gently pulled Danny toward her. She wrapped her arms around his shoulder. Danny wrapped his arms around her back and held tightly. He buried his face into her shoulder and cried. Lindsay closed her eyes as she felt tears coming. At that moment, they weren't partners. They were friends. One was there when the other needed them. And Danny was in dire need of Lindsay's help. He'd gone out to find a way to bury his pain, so had she. He had managed to help her, she was trying to return the favor.

Lindsay took a deep breath. "Louie knew you were worth saving."

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I thouhgt Danny could use Lindsay after Run Silent Run Deep. I found that the song would work for an opening. It's pretty funny actually. anyways, what did you think? review please!!


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